Wednesday, December 5, 2012

What Defines A Zombie?

The question was asked of me on Facebook this morning. "In relation to film, what defines a zombie?" I immediately opened my mouth to answer, but then realized that would be stupid; she lives on the other side of the state & would never hear me. So I put my fingers to work on typing. Before I knew it, her Facebook comment section was much too large and looked like a wall of text. So, here we are at my blog. And here is my answer. 

"Rule #1: CARDIO"

In relation to film, zombies have been presented in various ways. The most common, at least as it pertains to the modern zombie genre, is an out-of-control virus. Sometimes on film it's due to mysticism (voodoo, inspired by Haitian folklore) or something of a Biblical nature. Although the origin of the film zombie may vary, the one absolute that they all share is their need for cannibalism. The taste of human flesh (and sometimes brains; more on this later). 

So the first thing that defines a zombie is a hunger for manflesh, and I suppose certain parts of woman-flesh,  (what, you haven't heard of a zombie romance before?).

The rest of the zombie qualities vary, often from filmmaker to filmmaker, much like vampires do. Thankfully, to my knowledge, there have been no sightings of sparkly zombies yet. Let's examine a few films and see what we get. 

"Rule #2: Double Tap"

Frankenstein's Monster (who many foolishly refer to as "Frankenstein") is perhaps one of the earliest examples of a zombie in fiction. Based on Mary Schelley's book of the same name, Frankenstein is, in essence, a re-animated corpse. Built from the pieces of buried people, the monster is reanimated by a bolt of lightning. In most versions, the Frankenstein Monster is not a flesh-eater, and therefore may not be considered by many to be a "zombie" in the sense that we know them now. I would argue that perhaps the concept of eating human flesh had not yet been introduced into fiction, and I thus would give him a pass. To me, Frankenstein's Monster is a zombie. But can we use him as a baseline for all others to be compared to? Your milage may vary here. While we ponder that (you're thinking of Herman Munster as a zombie now, aren't you?), let's take a look at another cinematic entry. 

1932's "White Zombie" (not to be confused with the band, who's lead singer still sings about Living Dead Girl(s) ) is often cited as the first full-length zombie film. Critics hated it in 1932, but it has found a cult following here in 2012. I have not watched it, but wikipedia tells me that it tells the story of a married woman who dies and is then turned into a zombie by an evil voodoo master (is there any other kind?). This obviously follows the Haitian folklore of zombification as it relates to mysticism. According to wikipedia, the eating of flesh does not appear in this film; rather, the voodoo master uses his zombies as slaves for his bidding (I'll leave that up to your imagination). 

I'm starting to contradict myself here. "But James, didn't you say they were all cannibals?" Read on, dear reader.

"Rule # 7: Travel Light"

In 1968, filmmaker George A. Romero changed the landscape of modern zombie horror forever. 1968's "Night of the Living Dead", in glorious black & white, gave audiences a new kind of horror: re-animated corpses that literally dug out of their own fucking graves. A few fleshy civilians become trapped in a farmhouse while a legion of the undead try frantically to get inside. "Night of the Living Dead", inspired in part by the novel "I Am Legend" (more on the film version of "Legend coming up), introduced audiences to a new brand of terror. There was no ratings system in those days, so children bought tickets right alongside adults. And people were scared out of their minds. 

While trapped in the farmhouse, a radio can be heard giving us a typical 1960's reason for these events--radioactive contamination occurred when a space probe returning from Venus exploded in Earth's atmosphere--but audiences were hooked. The modern zombie genre was just beginning, and these zombies were hungry for your fleshy bits. And in a turn that was controversial at the time, none of the humans made it out alive (although some were turned to zombies). Interestingly, Romero would later craft a sequel, "Return of the Living Dead", which introduced audiences to the brain-eating zombie. This is a trait that has remained in popular takes on the genre. 

So, we've established 3 common zombie takes: Re-animated Corpse, Cannibalism, and brain devouring. We've discovered that zombies sometimes come back due to science (Frankenstein), mysticism (White Zombie), and even Venus juice (Night of the Living Dead). But is that all that defines a zombie?

"Rule #31: Check The Back Seat"

Romero would go on to make many sequels to his iconic. "Night of", including helming a remake. The market grew tired of zombies through the 80's, with at least one zombie film going into camp territory with the zombies actually chanting "Brains!!!". The age of the vampire began in the 90's, and zombies were a bit forgotten. 



 
Along came "28 Days Later" in 2002 (America would not see this until 2003). Although it had been touched on in literature & film before, "28 Days" introduced the world at large to "zombie by infection." The film introduces us to the "Rage Virus", which, once exposed, takes over your body in approximately 30 seconds. This concept was terrifying to many because it's a plausible scenario. We can contract rabies & lose our minds already, but the thought of a virus that turns you into a zombie? Kinda scary. 

Now, I am not what you would call a zombie afficionado; there's LOTS I haven't read or watched. But this was, for me, the first instance of seeing zombies that can run, zombies that will chase you down. '68's "Night of the Living Dead" was scary because the zombies were so many; in "28 Days Later", a single zombie could take a room full of people. There is much debate on whether a virus-induced condition can define one as a zombie. And it's an excellent question. My answer is: maybe. A virus-induced zombification could lead one to take on zombie-like qualities, but is this much different than an extreme case of rabies? Of someone driven so mad that they attack on instinct and eat human flesh? It could go either way, really. Whether through folklore or cinematic exposure, I'm inclined to think that people imagine corpses digging out from their graves when the word "zombie" appears in their mind; but then, current zombie trends always begin with a virus. 

We'll call this one a wash, with a slight slant towards zombie.

This brings us to the following: zombies share a taste for Kentucky Fried Human, they are re-animated corpses, they sometimes share a love for brains, and they are typically brought about through mystical or scientific means. At this point, we've seen all the variations, right?

Wrong. 

"Rule #34: Clean Socks
 



 

2007 brought us another variation: the thinking man's zombie.The Will Smith vehicle, "I Am Legend", is a film adaptation of the novel of the same name, with some slight variations. The novel, set in Los Angeles,  describes a man named Robert Neville who is the last man alive in the city. The novel describes the antagonists as "vampires", not zombies, and Neville even takes to guarding himself with garlic and crucifixes. During the day  he hunts them, driving stakes through their heart. 

The film version is much more ambiguous, although the "darkseekers", as Smith's Neville come to call them, are said to be predatory & "vampiric in nature." The film is about a scientist, the last man alive in New York City  instead of the novel's Los Angeles setting, who is trying to cure the disease that has transformed the population into these vampiric zombies. Unfortunately, the film misses the point of the novel completely; in the end, he sacrifices his life to stop the creatures so that a woman & her daughter can deliver his cure to a survival camp, thus making Neville a legend in human history. The alternate ending, which is much closer to the novel, is better; while searching for the cure, Neville ensnares a female "vampire / zombie" in a trap to conduct his experiment. Later, wesee the "darkseekers" set a similar trap for Neville. In the alternate ending, during the attack on his home, one of the vampiric zombies comes forth, showing actual concern for the female. Neville has now realized that these creatures have their own "society", so to speak, and that he is the true monster of the story. While they were like bogeymen to Neville, he was the one attempting to snuff them out. He was the monster they would warn their young about; Neville had become a monster of legend, in their eyes. This is in line with the ending of the book; he's not OUR legend for finding a cure (he doesn't); he's their legend for waging war against them. 

Thus bringing me to my point; zombies, until now, had largely operated in a bee-like mentality in cinema. They operated in large numbers, often assisting each other but rarely appearing to communicate or form plans of attack. In "I Am Legend", the vampzombies set traps, have relationships with each other, and form attack patterns. This is largely unique to the genre, as far as I'm aware, although I could be wrong. So do the monsters depicted in "I Am Legend" qualify as zombies?

I'm going to have to go with "no". For one thing, the novel clearly calls them "vampires" (see the pic above). For another, these "darkseekers" hunt when hungry & don't seem to follow the typical zombie formula. Sorry to any "I Am Legend" fans (of which I'm one). 

"Rule #8: Get A Kickass Partner




 
2009's "Zombieland" was a return to form for the zombie genre. Brought about by a mutated strain of mad cow disease, these were (almost) classic zombies: undead, flesh / brain eating, quick moving, and a bee-like swarm mentality. The basic communication skills from "I Am Legend" were gone (Bill Murray disguises himself as a zombie so he can still go out & play golf; the zombies suspect nothing), and the zombies were unpredictable & more scary for it. This film also went for a unique blend: it combined comedy with the horror, wherein films in the past had swayed all the way towards one or the other.

This film highlights another detail that defines zombies that I neglected to mention: if you want to (re)kill them, you have to shoot or remove the head. They can keep coming through the loss of limbs & other parts, but they cannot operate without their head. Although both were created by a virus, Zombieland qualifies more than "I Am Legend" in the genre of zombies. 

Zombies now defined as: undead, flesh / brain craving, brought about by mysticism /  Biblical / scientific means, and they cannot operate without their head. 

Zombies will never truly go out of style. Future generationswill add to the legend, just as Romero did. As Danny Boyle did with "28 Days Later". With the (improbable) December 21st Apocalypse now looming large, I think a small part of all of us are hoping for zombies.  Having a bad day at work? Pop a few zombies on your way home. It's not like they have feelings, right? Well...




 
In 2013 (assuming no zombie apocalypse), a film called "Warm Bodies" will be released. Based on a novel of the same name, it tells the story of a world in which the zombie apocalypse has already happened and humans treat them like dangerous animals...but otherwise, everyone lives somewhat in harmony. Through the process of eating a brain, the zombie gets to experience the life of their victim. And so it is that a zombie falls in love with a human, perhaps learning more about himself along the way. This sounds like a lot of fun, so I'm looking forward to it. 

In closing, and this is too long already, after loosely examining a few zombie classics, here is (in my opinion) what defines a zombie as it relates to film:

• A corpse gets re-animated. This is a must. The body can die from virus exposure as long as it is considered dead and then undead. Mutated doesn't quite cut it for me (sorry "I Am Legend")

• A re-animated corpse can be decomposed, sometimes immensely so; but a zombie cannot be a skeleton, which means I don't have to worry about my grandfather coming back.  

• Zombies are cannibals.  No exception.

• Mysticism or science should be involved, although an exception can be made for space magic-- Romero 's "Night Of" is just too much fun.

• Only damage to the head, or complete removal of the head, can re-kill a zombie. 

• In the case of science creating a zombie, it needs to be more like "28 Days Later" or it's sequel (flesh eating mindless killers) and less like "I Am Legend" (only come out at night, social structure, trap setting)

Everyone loves zombies, and 12/21 is coming up fast. The Book of Revelation spoke of oceans turning red & the dead rising from their graves. Well, the ocean off the Australian coast is currently red (sea plankton, they say); could zombies be next?

And if they do come, will they be as our movies have defined them? Or will they be something else entirely? Time will tell. Infection could certainly lead to zombie status, no doubt; but only if said infection leads one to become symptomatic of the classic traits. A virus that mutates isn't the same thing to me, at all. 

I hope I answered the question.


UPDATE:




In my rush to complete this article, I completely forgot about the smash-hit television show, "The Walking Dead."

Normally, I would not include a television show in a discussion about film. The two mediums cannot often be compared. Although I have not yet had a chance to watch this show (I'll be picking up Seasons 1 & 2 after Christmas), it's hard to deny that the production values are through the roof. I mean, just look at that picture...awesome stuff. Those who have viewed this show will know more than I, so ask your local postman, druggist, or Zombie Hunter for more information.

So, what say you? What's YOUR favorite zombie film of all time? Which film best captures the look, style, and tone that you think of when you hear the word "Zombie"? And don't forget to look for the adaptation coming soon of "World War Z", starring Brad "I totally get to nail Angelina every night" Pitt.

Oh, and BRRRRRAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Simple Truth's Episode IV: Simple Truth's Strike Back

Believe it or not, someone actually asked me if I'd do another of these...so here it is. More Simple Truth's...

• You're still not listening; hence why you haven't been told the story yet.

• My dad? Still beating up your dad!

• Vanilla Sky is still the greatest film ever made. Truth.

• You can't logically argue that last point until you've actually seen the film.

• My "little brother", Travis, got married a few weeks ago. Despite my personal life, I couldn't be more happy for him. Truth.

• I found out at his reception that I'm a dancing magnet for cougars. Who knew?

• No, I didn't go home with one. Absolute truth.

• I've recently discovered that I'm scary-good at guessing middle names.

• She might agree with the "scary" part.

• I agree with the "good". Truth.

• I finally conquered my fear of the dentist.

• I was told I have a beautiful smile. Truth?

• I'm nervous about the restaurant I've chosen for Saturday, because I've never been there.

• It comes recommended by my best friend, who I'd literally take a bullet for, so I trust him.

• Looking forward to trying it out. Truth.

• I really don't like my job.

• I was given a regional award for this job this month, so apparently I'm doing okay at it.

• Might move to Airway Heights or Spokane when the house sells anyway.

• Options are open. Truth.

• I get, on average, about 4 hours of sleep at night.

• My dad gets more than that because he does sometimes take a break from beating up your dad.

• My dad will never read this.

• He's awesome anyway. Truth.

• Alex Smith of the 49ers had almost a perfect game Monday, throwing the football.

• They're my pick for the Super Bowl this year.

• I'm still scared of water.

• But I'm willing to jump in anyway, if I'm asked...

• Smoky Mountain Christmas is one of my favorite Christmas movies.

• My mom & I have a traditional "wrapping party", held every year around December 23rd, and have been doing this since I was 4 or 5.

• Already making plans for this year.

• I've never had a birthday party. Not once.

• I don't see things changing this year.

• That's okay, I'll be working anyway. Truth.

• If I ever did, I'd like my local Facebook friends to be there.

• Probably wouldn't come anyway. Definite truth.

• Jay Pitt, my old boss who lives in Coeur d'Alene, is still the fuckin' man!.

• Divorces do nothing for your self-confidence.

• I almost stayed home from work today because of my dog; her eyes get me every time!

• I went to work anyway.

• Kinda feel bad about it.

• The eyes are the first thing I notice about a woman.

• Oh, stop! Read blog #1...this isn't about you, we're talking about me here.

• I have an interesting story to tell; the only one of its kind on this planet! But you have to listen! I'm begging you to listen!

• I still miss my high school hairline.

• I've never had a real hangover. Truth.

• And yes! I *have* drank enough, thank you verry much!

• David Copperfield, the illusionist, is mesmerizing to watch.

• He was even better in person. Truth.

• I'd love to take a vacation to Vegas sometime.

• Right after my vacation to San Francisco to see a 49ers game.

• I want to go skydiving.

• I have an immense fear of failure.

• And a fear of not living up to my dad.

• I haven't so far.

• But I'm still working on it. Truth.

• I'm more comfortable in a suit & tie than I am jeans & a t-shirt.

• I'm just drawn that way (somebody never watched "Cool World"!)

• Life is amazingly like a movie; if the script calls for it, people are always right in the location you assume them to be.

• I don't know who I'd pick to play me in a film about my life. A young Christian Slater, maybe?

• If Tom Cruise was in it, I wouldn't care who played me.

• Go On, starring 'Chandler' from "Friends", is the best show on tv.

• Probably because I can relate to it. Truth.

• I still have that amazing story to tell, and it's only getting better every day...

• ...If you listen, I'll tell it to you. But you really have to listen.

Friday, September 7, 2012

Simple Truth's Part 3

It's like a trilogy.....

• My Warwick family is so large, we could outnumber a small nation.

• I stayed up extra late last night because I met a cousin I didn't know I had!

• That is beyond cool, and so is she. Truth. (hi Becke!)

• I look forward to the day when we can all get together.

• I'm also scared due to the number of years we've been apart.

• If you promise to listen, I will still tell you a story. But you really do have to listen!

• In high school, my buddy & I took my Firebird to the gravel pit and started practicing stunts for a movie we wanted to film. When our dad's saw us later, they demanded to know where we were all day and seperated us so we couldn't make up a story together.

• We ended up giving our dad's the same story anyway, completely exhonerating us! Truth.

•  I was the Associated Student Body President my senior year in Odessa. That school was mine.

• My first act as President? Getting softer toilet paper installed in all bathrooms. (You're welcome, Paul)

• My second act? Getting the student body to approve my financial plan to get better music equipment for the band / orchestra.

• When it went to the school board, my plan was shut down. But I tried.

• I always wanted to be a detective, like my father.

• Sherlock Holmes always wanted to be a detective, like my father. Truth.

• You still haven't watched "Cool World"

• I own a house in Odessa.

• I'm soon going to be selling that  house in Odessa.

• Outside of the special effects, Avatar was kind of a shitty movie.

• But I like the Star Wars prequels, so what do I know?

• Contrary to simple logic, you CAN make a '79 Chrysler Cordoba jump like the General Lee.

• K.I.T.T. from Knight Rider was way cooler than the General Lee.

• Neither show was actually that good though.

• Looking at it with adult eyes, He-Man is very homoerotic.

• You just have to listen. Truth.

• Peyton Manning is overrated.

• So's his brother Eli.

• My dad...yep. Still beating up your dad.

• Old Chicago is the. greatest. pizza. ever. So much truth it hurts.

• Red Robin kinda sucks. (subjective truth)

• I miss Drew's laugh & sense of humor.

• He and his brother Ryan drowned during a fishing trip. Miss you guys. Definite truth.

• Some of the things in these 3 truth blogs are meant for your entertainment.

• I wore a Gene Simmons mask at an Odessa vs Davenport basketball game in high school.

• I tried to be very obnoxious, to throw off the rhrythm of my cousin Nick, who was awesome.

• It didn't work.

• But Odessa won the game :-) (sorry Nick)

• I had a cigarette in my house last night.

• I enjoyed it.

• I probably come off as a jerk to a lot of people. But that's just because you're not paying attention to the details.

• I can predict, with I'd estimate a 90% success rate, exactly what a person will say in any given situation.

• That 10% where I misfire? Women, mostly.

• You can get people to do whatever you want them to do if you just agree with what they say. (work truth)

• I bet it would work outside of the workplace, too (not-fact-based-truth)

• Now I definitely sound like a jerk. But I'm just being truthful.

• I miss my grandparents, and wish I could ask their advice.

• Grandma would make me some chicken and listen while I drink an orange soda.

• Grandpa would try to touch my chicken.

• I've always known that when I die, it will be alone. Not that I won't have family or friends; just that when the moment occurs, I will be by myself.

• You're wondering right now why I'm so hung up on "truth"...

• ...If you listen, I will tell you a story. But you have to listen.


Thursday, September 6, 2012

Simple Truth's Part 2

More simple truth's...

• The WB/CW television series "Smallville" is, despite the cheesiness, my favorite tv show of all-time.

• I am a smoker, and wish that I wasn't. Actively trying to quit.

• I don't smoke in the house.

• I've successfully gone 10 hours without one on several occasions. The key is to find something to do that is fun, and keeps your mind off of it.

• I like "chick flicks". Truth.

• I teared up near the end of "The Dark Knight Rises". Truth.

• I still laugh at guys who cry at movies.

• I'm a bit of a contradiction (but I'm not complicated)

• I think anyone looking to get into a relationship should be forced to write up a column like this, to avoid any "you never told me you _____!" 4 years later.

• I was sad to see my marriage end.

• We're both better off because it did. Truth.

• My dad can still beat up your dad.

• My brother, Matt, is all talk.

• My brother, Jeff, would give you the shirt off his back even if it meant he had to freeze.

• Jeff is too nice.

• So am I.

• "Once More, With Feeling", is one of the greatest 70 minutes of television. Ever. If you know what this is, you agree.

• Chris Pine Captain Kirk is better than William Shatner Captain Kirk.

• "The Hammer...is my penis" is one of the greatest lines of dialogue ever written...if you've seen the delivery & context.

• "Batman Returns" is every bit as good as "The Dark Knight".

• "Batman Returns" is basically a noirish telling of Dickens' "A Christmas Carol". See my "Retro Film Review" blog for truth.

• My dog is my best little buddy.

• The Godfather Trilogy is godly good.

• I'm scared of spiders.

• My Warwick family has a castle. And my dad can beat up your dad. Top it. Truth.

• I like to listen to cartoons that I grew up with while I clean.

• You still need to watch "Cool World". Don't be lazy.

• I write screenplays in my spare time.

• I wrote, directed, produced, edited, and acted in my own 74-minute film in 2004.

• It kinda sucked. Truth.

• But I caught the film editing bug big time.

Women like to be asked questions in person, not through text or email. Like I said, I'm sometimes slow on the details.

• My dad is shaking his head at this entire blog right now. Truth.

Angelina Jolie is beautiful.

• Michelle Pfeiffer is still gorgeous, which is ahead of beautiful. Truth.

• I really enjoy the "Transformers" films, even though most don't seem to.

• I'm a good man, trying to become a great one. Truth.

• Some people will read this blog post, and part 1, and will not post a comment.

• Most will skip over the Facebook links that bring you here, and will just click "like" to make me think they read it. Truth.

• This blog has a stat tracker, that not only keeps track of oageviews but also the site that forwarded them here. So don't click "like" if you didn't look at it :-)

• Nothing is more important than family.

• My buddy, Lee, should work for the government tracking down illegal sites. Nobody knows the 'net better than him, and he can find ANYTHING if you give him a smoke and 10 minutes.

• My dad will now probably skip your dad and go straight to beating ME up for getting him into so many fights today :-D

• I can take him!

• That last one is a lie.

• May Mumm-Ra bless you this day! Truth.

• Okay, so he's a Thundercats character...he's still a pimp.

• "The Cake Is A Lie."

• There is no spoon.

Simple Truth's

Taking a break from the normal rigamarole of this blog (does anyone use that word anymore? Well, they should), I thought I would take this opportunity at a very slow day at work to list some very simple truths. Cold hard facts. As I see them, anyway, so your mileage may vary. If you want to know something about me? Here's a good start. Apologies ahead of time to my Dad, "The Jerry", as it may list something about a party. Maybe. Oh, and you won't find any silly things like "my dad could beat up your dad."  Okey dokey, in no particular order:

•Black is my favorite color (we'll start with the easy ones). No, I'm not emo & no, I'm not a goth guy...I just dig black. If I were a Superhero, my costume would be black.

• If you read something on this list and automatically assume it's a slam on you personally, there's a 99.9% chance that it's not. We're not talking about you, we're talking about me here.

• "You" are still fuming over that last point. Truth.

• Joe Montana is the GREATEST quarterback who EVER played the game.

• Tom Brady just might be better.

• Justin Parr's party in his garage back in High School was the greatest. party. ever. And even though she's moved on to much better things than hanging out with me, I'm pretty sure she remembers it fondly too.

• Reference to above: Nope, not talking about the first person who enters your mind when you think of my high school years.

• And no, it wasn't THAT. Get your mind out of the gutter!


• We burned the pictures from that party. Truth.

• The oath taken to remain silent about the party was broken by my best friend within a week or two.

• I've never regretted the party, or the people who were there or at Nemo's.

• I have regretted the weeks following that party.

• I wish I still had those pictures. Truth.

• Thomas Wilson is the greatest friend a guy ever asked for.

• I miss my dog, Sindy, who entered our lives when I was 10 and left us when I was 22.

• We had to euthanize her because she had a pretty bad stroke. The night before, she was obviously scared and in pain. I stayed with her, huddled on the floor, until the sun came up.

• The memory of that night still makes me cry. Truth.

• I never feel more ashamed than when I have been forced to ask my Dad for financial help.

• My parents got along so badly near the end, I actually told my dad one night that they should just get divorced and be done with it.

• I love Coors Lite from the tap, but can't stand it in a bottle or a can.

• I wish I had a better relationship with God.

• I wish I went to Church on Sundays...

•...but NFL football is on Sunday, so I don't.

• But I really should in the offseason :-)

•I have a completely irrational fear of water.

• I do love my Xbox 360!

• When Mass Effect 2 came out a few years back, I had a marathon session of 14 hours! Longest of my life, felt like 3 or 4.

• Didn't feel bad about it.

• Would never do it again.

• I wish some people would check their Facebook messages more often!

• I wish some people would just get the hell off Facebook! You're annoying and you didn't even know it?!?!?

• Obviously, I'm not talking about anyone on my friends list who is reading this. Silly.

• Obviously, that last point was a lie! Seriously, start a blog if you want to ramble! That's what I did lol

• I'm pretty sure Green eyes are my favorite.

• I'm color blind.

• Nobody but the State Patrolman, Tow-Truck Driver, and myself know just how bad my Christmas Day crash REALLY was, and how it's a miracle from God that I'm still here.

• I miss my position at Microsoft. The SSM one, not the other one.

• With the exception of a few, I don't miss many of the people there.

• I try to type grammatically correct, with correct punctuation, while texting.

• I'm allergic to cats, but Benadryl fixes it.

• I'm allergic to seafood, particularly shellfish, and Benadryl only delays death by minutes. Or so my doctor says; I've never tried it.

• I miss my Camaro that I crashed on Christmas, even though it was starting to fall apart.

• I liked Britney's "Toxic" album. I know, I know, but we're talking truths.

• If you want to know me, the REAL me, all you've got to do is ask.

• If you combined the cumulative knowledge of me from everyone who knows me, you'd see a pretty decent picture of who I really am. But it would take everyone, because nobody has the full picture by themselves.

• I consider it an insult when people treat this job like a joke when I've dedicated my life to being the best.

• I've been held at gunpoint, and it was the training from Jay Pitt that saved my life.

• Yes, Dad, I agree that Jay is a little goofy.

• I'm constantly scared that my bloodline, and family name, will end with me.

• I wish I had my father's courage, and his ability to fake it in those rare times when it eludes him.

• My father is the greatest man I've ever known.

• I recently came to grips with the fact that I'll never reach his level. But that's okay, as long as I try.

• I may miss the small details, but I always cath the important ones.

• I'm terrible with names, but faces never leave me.

• I'm almost done, I promise.

• I wish I was an actor.

• I miss my high school hairline.

• I collect first-print graphic novels.

• Autobiographies are my favorite book.

• I've been typing away at my phone for an hour now, off and on, and still no reply from Facebook.

• Maybe I misread the situation.

• I'm historically bad at misreading women in these situations. Heh.

• Christmas is my favorite holiday.

• Fall is my favorite season (the colors!)

•  You really can't go home again.

• I've always wanted to see London.

• If you listen, I'll tell you a story. But you have to listen.

• I'm not complicated, I'm just drawn that way.

• That last point was a reworded reference to "Cool World".

• You should watch "Cool World".

• "Vanilla Sky" is the greatest film of all-time.

• Tom Cruise is the greatest actor of our generation (haters gonna hate)

• The kid in me will always love Superman & Batman.

• Christopher Nolan's "Dark Knight Trilogy" is our generations' "Star Wars".

• My dad could beat up your dad.

Truth.




Tuesday, September 4, 2012

I'm Back, Baby! ~ Booster Gold, "52"

Well, it's been a very long time since my last post, and it's been an interesting journey.

Some of you know that my wife and I decided to call it quits. Bring down the curtain, take the giant hook and yank the fat lady off the stage, stick a fork in it--we're done.

We've been done for quite a while, actually, but I'm just getting around to now posting an update. I won't bore anyone with details (and it would be inappropriate to do so, anyway), so I'll just say that after a long and trying summer (and in the words of Booster Gold (interestingly, just before he got blown up)) -- I'M BACK, BABY!



Haha

Work is great, life is good, dog is awesome. (yes, I have a dog...she's amazing)

So, about that voice acting project with a certain bat-themed vigilante. The project is NOT dead, regardless of rumors or speculation. It's very much still going on. When I started this in March of 2011, I had no idea the large undertaking I had taken on; I assumed it would be a summer project, and then it'd be on to other things.

Boy, was I an idiot.

But, all is not lost. The first arc, "Batman & Son", is complete. Arc #2 is around 75%, and "RIP" is around 50%. The massive hold up, excluding a few months this summer where I just wasn't interested, is voices. I actually had a voice actor who had completed over half of his lines, and then...dropped out. Very unexpectedly. So, I've been forced with a hard decision--start over with a new voice actor, or soldier on and replace him.

It may disappoint some, but I have decided on starting over with a new voice actor. We've been doing these in an episodic nature, and although it often happens on television or in animation, I just didn't want the change in actors. It would seem too abrupt, to me. So, we're starting over with the voice actor.

My apologies for anyone who is chomping at the bit for this (does anyone actually remember it? lol), but this will make a much better project in the long run.

The episodes posted no longer work, I see...so I will have to work to get them back up and online at videobam. Just know that I'm working on the project, and I haven't forgotten all of your very hard work!

So, saying that, I'll end again with "I'm Back". And the RealSmallville is back with me.